Browsing Tag

Parenting by Heart

Surrender is not a dirty word

This surrender is not weak or submissive. It is not ‘giving in’. Surrender, in this context, is really about acceptance of where our child is at right now, as well as where we are as parents, and about ‘letting go’. Surrender means living in the present, not missing precious moments through resentment or blame – especially blaming ourselves – for…
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Attachment parenting – bonding or bondage?

You have lovingly, gently responded to your baby's cues, you have been respectful about how you interact with your toddler, you have read and researched how you can help your child develop optimum mental, emotional and physical well-being and you have encouraged his joyous spirit. Along the way, you have copped reactions from family,…
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A rod for your back?

“I was on the phone this morning and the person at the other end heard my baby crying. When I told her I was cuddling him, she said, “well you’ve created a rod for your own back now,” says Jody, mother of an eight week old. When your competence as a mother comes under scrutiny and you feel judged, t’s easy for the doubts to creep in…
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Not Guilty

It’s confession time. Sometimes I lied to my kids. Once, the youngest told me he couldn’t go to school. He said he felt sick. I discovered he had been in trouble during sport the day before and had to write a ‘sorry’ letter to the teacher. I put one and one together but I didn’t let him see it added up to him feeling sick. ‘Have you done a…
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Wiring tiny brains to manage stress

Are you worried that picking your baby up when he cries will ‘spoil’ him? Or that you might create ‘bad habits’ by responding to his wails too quickly?If you are feeling torn between your head (or advice to ‘let him cry’) and your heart which is breaking over your baby’s tears, relax – and give him a cuddle. Your comfort could be wiring his…
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Networking the mother ‘hood’

Joining the Mother ‘Hood’ offers a whole new dimension to the concept of ‘networking’. Although it probably won’t help you raise any glass ceilings, your mothering network may prevent you from sliding into a downward spiral towards isolation and despair. If you don’t yet have a baby, it is all too easy to underestimate how vulnerable you can…
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Planning your ‘baby moon’

I find it quite astonishing that people will spare no expense or effort to plan an elaborate wedding and a romantic honeymoon and yet the greatest change of life – having a baby- is often expected to be a mere ‘blip on the radar’ that should fit into an already busy schedule. In fact, many couples assume that this time will be a great opportunity…
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